Miss Annoying

I'm at the Korean airport waiting at my gate.  I have to go through security at each step of the way because they are all international connections.  This is not a quick change so I'm fine.  The guy sitting next to me right now just came out of the smoking lounge (they have those here) and he stinks to high heaven.

My first flight was pretty good.  I had a window seat but when I got there the aisle guy was sitting in it.  I went ahead and took the aisle thinking it'd be good if I needed to get up, which it would have been, but I slept on the plane (which is a small miracle) so I never had to get up.  So happy I got a couple of hours of sleep.  It made the flight shorter and was restful.  

The girl sitting between me and the guy who stole my seat, (his girlfriend) was one of the more annoying people I've ever sat next to on a plane.  She looked just like Kira from The Dark Crystal (except with black hair) and she spent the whole flight nudging me, bumping me, poking me, prodding me, and tapping me (I know...sounds like "I Can Hear the Bells" from Hairspray.  I wasn't hearing bells though...let me tell you).  She planned her attack mostly through the armrest.  Armrests on airplanes are really not armrests.  They are deliniations.  You stay on your side.  I'll stay on my side.  This Kira look-a-like thought that both her armrests were hers alone and thought that the three inches hovering on each side of the armrest were also hers.  Yes.  She can have the three inches on her side but my three inches are MINE, dammit.

So, at the end of the flight when everybody stands up and gathers their belongings (oh god...the smoking guy next to me just pulled out an ENORMOUS box of Camels that he just bought from duty-free...he's going to die from lung cancer) she pulled the best one yet.  People are already pushy and shovey during this part of the flight, but, until they open those doors, there is really no where to go.  I was standing in my seat area with one foot in the aisle, just about ready to lean on the back of the seat in front of me (the seat that had been in front of me the whole flight) when Kira Girl shoves me over (bodily) and drapes her whole self over the back of that seat!  The aisle seat!  In my territory!  She had her own middle seat back that she could drape over.  Come on.  I was not having that.  I tapped her on the shoulder and said, "Nope.  That's mine."  She moved over about six inches and we draped together in anti-companionship for the three minutes it took to get people moving.  

Next stop:  Dallas.